Tampico Trauma

I must look a mess I must admit
But I have been travelling quite a bit
South of the Border
Where the law and order
Is kept by Federales who just grin
And tell you they just want to be your friend

I left for Tampico last July
I jumped off that boat I almost died
There to greet us
Were pretty senoritas
I swore that I would not go home then
All those lovely ladies were my friends
Whoa, those sweet chiquitas they don't pretend

-- Spoken: "Como esta, Capitain..."

That is all I really want to say
I was thrown out of the country yesterday
See I was, drinkin' double
Causin' lots of trouble
When the man looked in the window of the bar and he grinned
And said, "If you come back we just may not be your friend"
"I don't want to see you 'round here again"
"If you come back next time we may not..." (Hidy ho' boys!)